so this is finally the last stretch. it's so surreal that the moment we've been working hard for will finally come in just three days. time passes too fast. way too fast. all that hard work. all the pain. all the time sacrificed. all the joy. all the laughter. all of it will be over in just six minutes. in just six minutes we may never get another chance to dance that same dance ever again. that same dance that we've done countless of times over the past months. i don't know if i should be relieved. or should i feel sad. 

and in just a matter of hours, my dearest ip team will be performing. every single time i watch them perform, i can't help but to smile. smile at their pretty and captivating costumes and umbrellas. smile at their cheerful and cute dance. but most of all smile at how far they've come. i remember spending the end of last year teaching some of them traditional steps. then, they were very unfamiliar with even the most basic of traditional dance. but look at all of them now. i'm really proud at how much they've improved. and in such a short period of time at that. words cannot express how proud i am of them. and i really am grateful that i could play what small role i had in helping them to reach this level. i believe that they will do their best on stage tomorrow and show that njc malay dance has got what it takes to be malay. so what if they are performing a malay traditional dance with no malays at all? njc malay dance ip team will blow the judges away! :D

as for us, senior team, tuesday will be our final sprint. our final practice to polish up everything. we've trained really hard and none of us wants it to go to waste. all that tiredness, all that pain, we don't want it to be for nothing. and i believe we can do it. we shouldn't have any doubts. we have to believe that we can and will blow the judges away. WE DEFINITELY CAN DO IT :DD

this will be my fifth and last syf. and i want to make it count. but in fact, it already has. the past few months of intense training have really bonded myself with the group. sometimes, no most times, i wish that syf would never come 'cause after that six minutes, it will all be over. and even if we don't get that gold with honours (which i hope we will!), i won't say that this experience has been a waste. it has been anything but that. an award can't replace all the memories i've made over the past months. all the tears and laughter. i have never been so bonded to a group before. in all my years of dance, i have never regarded my dance group as a second family. and in only a period of one and a half years at that. undeniably, things will change after syf. people will leave. i will leave. goodbyes are inevitable. but why must it be so painful? sometimes goodbye though it hurts in your heart, is the only way for destiny...

shucks. i'm crying again. this brings me back to when i started crying on thursday night after rewatching gwen's video, reading dancers' blog entries on post-syf and reading phuong's touching email. i even cried the morning after, at the atrium! heck i might even cry during the last pose of our dance on wednesday. haha. i really am an emotional wreck right now. i'm overwhelmed with a whole mixture of emotions - excited, nervous, scared, sad.

ahh. this week will be a rollercoaster ride for all of us. i pray that everything will turn out well. but knowing that we've put in our best should be enough right?